How To Identify Sneaky Tactics During a Divorce

Between eight and 15% of divorces in the U.S. fall into the “high-conflict” category, according to Joan Kelly. High conflict refers to the anger and hostility involved. These couples spend an average of two to three years arguing these cases in court.

If you suspect your upcoming divorce might take a contentious turn, having one of the best divorce lawyers in Phoenix, AZ, representing you can bring you peace of mind. It’s also helpful to learn how to identify the sneaky divorce tactics so that you can recognize these strategies if your soon-to-be ex-spouse attempts them throughout the legal proceedings. Your awareness could prevent them from pulling a fast one in court when it is time to divide your assets and make key decisions like those surrounding child custody.

Below are several sneaky tactics significant others could try as the court seeks to finalize the marriage’s dissolution.

Look Out for Deliberate Delays

With the divorce underway, does it seem like your partner is dragging their feet at every turn? They might simply do this to work their way under your skin. However, these deliberate delays also indicate some sneaky divorce tactics.

By stalling during the legal process, your spouse might hope that you will give in to their demands. Maybe they hope you’ll agree to a settlement that isn’t necessarily in your favor. Common stall tactics during a divorce include:

• Failing to sign the necessary paperwork in a timely fashion.
• Refusing to communicate with you or provide your lawyer with access to their legal team.
• Changing attorneys more than once.

It’s one thing for your partner to be diligent about dotting their i’s and crossing their t’s while you separate. It’s quite another for them to intentionally make the process drag on. Why stand for this behavior that could make an already difficult situation even more tedious?

Shut Down Attempts of a Quick Settlement

You don’t want your partner to extend the divorce for months or even years. You also don’t want them to rush through it. Another sneaky tactic they might use is asking you to accept a settlement so that you can end the process quickly.

In theory, agreeing to a settlement with your spouse at the start of a divorce sounds fantastic. Won’t that mean you don’t have to worry about spending months attending hearings while trying to iron out minor details? It might, but you don’t want to accept your partner’s first settlement offer and call it a day if there are unseen tactics involved.

Could your spouse be trying to keep hidden assets out of your legal proceedings? That would limit the assets you receive. If your spouse is suddenly pushing you to accept a settlement offer and claiming it will benefit both of you, speak with your lawyer first.

This tactic might indicate that your lawyer should work harder to uncover any hidden income or assets that could come into play. If so, due diligence could strengthen your case.

Avoid Falling Victim To Financial Manipulation

A 2022 study by Meyer and Sledge reported that about 40% of married couples and other people in long-term relationships cite finances as their biggest cause of conflict. It follows that finances are also a major source of contention for divorcing couples, who often disagree on everything. Who should walk away from the marriage with more assets, and how much should one spouse pay the other for spousal and child support?

Financial manipulation sometimes affects legal proceedings because these questions are complicated. One spouse might empty a joint bank account and transfer money to one of their family members or friends to hide it from another spouse. The spouse may also hide valuable assets, like jewelry or artwork, and if the other spouse doesn’t think to include it in negotiations, this could go unnoticed and lead to an uneven property division process.

Notably, in the digital age, it’s becoming increasingly challenging for those going through a divorce to hide money and other assets. However, financial manipulation still goes on. Hiring the right attorney to look into your partner’s financial situation could minimize your chances of becoming a victim.

Put a Stop To Parental Alienation

Parental alienation occurs when one parent says and does things to turn children against their other parent. They might claim their other parent is divorcing them because they don’t like having kids. Sometimes, they reveal unflattering information about the other parent to purposely portray them in a bad light.

A 2016 study of nationally representative samples by Harman, Leder-Elder, et al. estimated that between 13% and 39% of parents have experienced alienating behaviors in the United States and Canada. The discussion also links this to Hands and Warshak’s 2011 research, which stated that 29% of children from divorced homes experience alienating behaviors from a parent.

This is one of the worst sneaky divorce tactics, as it puts many children, especially young ones, in an impossible position. Alienated children don’t know who to trust when it comes to their own parents. It may do serious harm to their mental and emotional well-being in the future.

If you believe your partner might be using parental alienation, seek to put an end to it promptly for the sake of your children. This behavior could also affect issues like child support and child custody. Even if you and your partner no longer see eye-to-eye, make it your mission to keep your children out of your legal proceedings for their own good.

If you cannot convince your spouse to agree, your attorney could give advice on how to regain control. Be open with them about what’s happening.

Be Suspicious of Potential Spousal Surveillance

So-called “spousal surveillance” is illegal in Arizona and many other states. This practice involves one spouse secretly recording the other spouse without their knowledge. Usually, they use wiretapping or bugging.

Despite being against the law, some people still engage in spousal surveillance while going through a divorce. Your partner might begin recording almost every move you make to collect evidence they can use against you. If you feel like they may be monitoring you without your permission, take these few simple steps to, at the very least, let them know that this behavior is unacceptable:

1. Document any evidence showcasing their usage of spousal surveillance.

2. Show your lawyer this evidence, especially where your partner is breaking the state law.

3. File a restraining order against your partner if you feel threatened.

By approaching a situation in this way, you can use your partner’s sneaky divorce tactics against them. Proving that they have been illegally documenting your whereabouts and interactions with others could affect their image in court.

Fight Back Against False Allegations

It’s unlikely that divorcing couples — including those involved in contentious court hearings — ever reach the point where one spouse is making false accusations against the other. However, a desperate spouse might take this approach if they sense they aren’t going to receive the rulings they want. For example, if you and your partner are not on good terms and they suspect a judge is preparing to award you primary custody of the children you share, they may accuse you of:

• Child abuse
• Domestic violence
• Addiction issues

They might even claim that you have engaged in criminal activities in the past, making you unfit to care for your children full-time. False allegations like this can put you in a tricky predicament since a judge will likely want to investigate them, no matter how outrageous they seem. At the very least, these curveballs could lead to delays in the divorce, not to mention create hard feelings between you and your partner.

Restrain yourself, and try not to give your partner the reaction they’re looking for, especially if you hear their false accusations for the first time in court. Be honest with your lawyer about what you believe is going on, and let them guide you through it.

Keep the Lines of Communication Open

You and your partner don’t necessarily need to act like good friends or even casual acquaintances during your divorce. If you prefer not to speak to them, you aren’t required to answer the phone when they call or interact in person. Still, shutting down all lines of communication could potentially make it appear as though you’re using sneaky divorce tactics.

If possible, communicate with them directly or through your respective lawyers. Give them the impression that you want fairness and what your shared children need to thrive.

Do You Suspect Your Spouse May Be Engaging in Sneaky Divorce Tactics? Contact Lincoln & Wenk, PLLC

If you believe your spouse is concealing assets or engaging in other sneaky divorce tactics, you won’t want to ignore their unethical actions. If you’re in Arizona, you might contact a lawyer from Lincoln & Wenk, PLLC, to investigate your concerns and assist you with the other aspects of the divorce process.

Call us at 623-294-2464 to discuss your case with a trusted attorney from Lincoln & Wenk, PLLC!