Talk to your kids about adoption

You already have two children, but you want to expand your family. You considered adoption before your first child was born, but never did it. Now you think it may be the right time.

You may have a variety of reasons. Maybe you know another family in the community looking to give a child up for adoption, and you want to help out. Maybe you have read the statistics and you know how many kids need homes; you can’t help all of them, but you can help one. Maybe you don’t want to go through a third pregnancy, but you still would like a third child.

Though the reasons can be different in each situation, there is one thing that experts agree on for all families: Everyone needs to agree.

This means sitting down and talking with your kids, extensively, before moving forward. You and your spouse may be on the same page, but are the children? How do they feel about the idea? Are they excited about the adoption, or are they resentful? When children don’t want the adoption to happen, though they legally don’t have a say in it, many problems can crop up.

If the kids aren’t on board, that doesn’t mean you can’t adopt. You just need to talk to them honestly and work with them until they agree. Experts aren’t saying the children will make all of the decisions for your family, but simply that you don’t want to rush through it without asking them or taking their desires into account.

Adoption can typically be a long process, and this is just one more step. Be sure you know all of the legal steps that have to be taken after your entire family is ready.

Source: The Spruce, “5 Reasons to Adopt a Child,” Carrie Craft, accessed May 02, 2017

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